My fast so far

So I started fasting after the rest of the people did. There was no way I could start on the 1^st with me being the cook at home. When I started I prayed that I be able to fast even just one day. I had lost the will power to not think about food when I’m fasting. I’d always find excuses on why I couldn’t and when you look for an excuse, you get a bagful of them. I sorry to say I kept that bag through 2009 and all I managed were half day fasts. So here I am in 2010 and I said this is a personal fast and it’ll take as long as necessary. There’s no definite stopping point. Why? I’ve been selfish in the past and all I’d think of was me. This time I’m doing this for others first then me. Now that’s going to take some time coz I love people. I truly do and when I’m burdened to pray for something for someone, I cannot heap on my requests there. It’s a love task I need to do before I look at my own issues. So here I am and I haven’t started on myself as yet. I’m not too demanding - just “not yet there” me :)

 

Day one

My resolution on keeping fitter- I go for a morning jog. I feel great. I’m asking myself if I’ll be able to get through this one. This is practically the first full fats in a year. I sail through

Day two

It’s raining so I won’t jog. I decide I’ll do three days a week, so I sleep on. Spanners start flying into the works. I ignore them and manage the day.

Day three

It’s raining again. Again, there’s this one spanner which just wants attention. I explore and dig a bit deep. I see the origin and pray that it’ll just disappear. I almost confronted the issue head on but I get a grip of reality on time and I let it pass. It was a most difficult day. Even the evening was not that calm.

Day four

Do I really need to jog seeing that I’m fasting? I feel drained a bit and wonder if I’ll carry on.

Day five

Still no jog. I’ve shelved it for later. After the fast. I smile when I see that I can fit into my black jeans without asking if they’re not tighter than when I first wore them.

Day six

This is two days after day five. (I just could not do it as I had to prepare food over the weekend. I’ll have to say I didn’t dine and fill up as I thought I would. I just enjoyed some of the things I don’t normally take for dinner.) The big question in the morning- will I last since I’ve been off for two full days? A week that started with a spanner dampens one’s spirit in some sort of way but I pulled through. I lasted and am on day seven.

Many more days to go

Just my take right now

This is going to be a quick post of a quick reflection

It’s 2010 and I’m still looking forward to a great year

I started fasting on Monday coz I couldn’t start on the 1^st due to the simple fact that I was up till the wee hours of dawn on the 1^st and I had to cook for visitors

Bottom line, when I cook I struggle with keeping a fast

I also started jogging on Monday

It’s something I hadn’t done in the past two years

Last year was worse coz I had no sort to even talk about

So I’m basically back on track as far as life is concerned

I’m looking at doing more this year compared to the last two years

Last year was the worst coz it somehow just passed by me and I awoke and here’s 2010

So, why the post?

It’s the quick reflection that’s spurred this post

On fasting, yesterday someone close just gave in coz of a mango and some issues on their plate

On my side I’ve just had the biggest attack mentally on record since like three years ago

It’s just one of those things that when you close your eyes you just about give up on the female gender

Yeah, yeah, I’m one of them but hey, sometimes we’re just the worst species on earth

We tend to hate more than anything that I know

For real

What we get up to when we’re angry or when we just want to spite someone

So I’ve been on the receiving side

Believe you me, at some point I almost gave in but THANK GOD!

My senses are back in full swing and I’ll take it as just one of the things the devil throws my way when I clean myself up spiritually

Indeed, this war that I fight daily is not carnal, it’s spiritual

To those in the flesh,

Watch out!

Time

Time has no divisions to mark its passage, there is never a thunder-storm or blare of trumpets to announce the beginning of a new month or year. Even when a new century begins it is only we mortals who ring bells and fire off pistols.

-- Thomas Mann